Red Herring!

TO THE CASTLE!!!!!!!!!

And it's a fucking museum...

And the guy running it fucking left me alone in here with Shauna.  What a fucking red herring!

Well, I've looked all around the castle and I've found nothing, and Shauna's been yammering on about Route 7 for a while, so I guess I should go there.  Also, she's physically stopping me from going to Route 6. which is the only other place to go besides Route 7--

Hey, what's down here?

A berry farm? There's a nice change of pace.  I could use some berries--

Only Oran and Pecha at the moment...and I have to grow the trees myself.  Awesome.

Also, there's a weird new mulching mechanic to make the trees grow faster? What the fuck is this, Animal Crossing? Keep the berry shit simple, please.  I'm not a farmer; I'm a ten-year-old who makes his pets fight.

Ah, here we go.  Route 7--

YOU ARE FUCKING KIDDING ME!

So I AM actually going up Route 6 to find the Poke Flute in some perfume chateau, yes? Good.  I'm going to assume there's some wild Pokemon over there, so let me do a bit of swapping in my team.  I don't like how Combusken is outranking my Frogadier at the moment, so he's tagging out; also, I really want my Fletchling to evolve and gain the Fire type, so I'll sub out Pidgeotto, too.  That means I have Fire and Flying covered, but no more Fighting...

I KNOW!

Aww, yeah! Let's go!

This road looks pretty straightforward...

(However, that is not the case...and here's why! Firstly, there are two side-paths that have tall grass up to your fucking eyeballs where you can't see shit but trainers will pop out and challenge your shit without much warning.  Secondly, Pokemon can attack you along the tall grass-line.  You heard that shit right: if you walk by those bushes, shit will STILL attack you! But hey, I can't bitch with what I walked away with from those encounters...)

Venipede:  A Bug/Poison-type Pokemon.  It evolves fairly slowly, but when it does, whoa boy, you better watch your ass.  It's a nice, solid back-up plan for Fairy-types, Dark-types, and even Electric-types, since it can learn Earthquake, I believe.  It's mostly for the Attack and Speed stats, though.

Audino:  A Normal-type Pokemon.  High HP, Defense, and Special Defense, as well as healing moves later on, he's your go-to staller in a tough battle.  Need to revive some of your better Pokemon? Throw in Audino.  Need to heal up but ran out of Potions? Use Audino.

Now, let's actually see what's in the tall grass around here...

Oddish...boring, but somehow adorably-nostalgic.  Caught it.

Oddish:  A Grass/Poison-type Pokemon.  He learns a shit-ton of effect moves like Poison Powder, Spore, and Stun Spore, as well as he might have the Effect Spore ability which is like auto-using an effect move whenever something hits it.  Very useful for catching other Pokemon.

Espurr...unneeded, since Ralts is doing just fine as my Psychic-type--

YOU KID ME.  YOU FUCKING KID ME! FLETCHLING, YOU GET IN THERE AND PECK UNTIL THAT FUCKER IS READY TO SUBMIT! I DON'T CARE IF HE'S MADE OF METALD AND HE HURTS YOUR FACE HE IS A GHOST-SWORD!

Honedge:  A Steel/Ghost-type Pokemon.  First of its kind and one I've been clamoring for among my friends for a while now.  Steel is really only weak to Ground-type, Fire-type, and Fighting-type attacks, but the Ghost-type renders all Fighting-type Pokemon useless.  Super-effective steel wall that's resistant to nearly everything, as well as a solid attacker.

This guy...needs to go...immediately into my team.  But who can I sub out? I don't see a whole lot of redundancies--

Holy shit, you got badass real fast! You're a nasty little cuss, aren't you?

Fletchinder:  A Fire/Flying-type Pokemon.  Now, my ultimate bug-fucker is ready.  Also, if anybody decides to whip out a Heracross, which is Bug/Fighting, this thing will obliterate it with x4 strong Flying-type attacks and the Flame Body ability which can burn the opponent on contact--

Shit, there's more?!

Have I mentioned that I fucking love the Experience Share? Because I do.  I love the Experience Share.  So much.  So very much.

Vespiquen:  A Bug/Flying-type Pokemon.  They're just...they're just so hard to acquire! Combee don't usually come female and breeding these things for perfect stats is a bitch, but at least I can practice with this one and figure out what's what--

Hey...if Vespiquen is Bug/Flying, Fletchinder is Fire/Flying, and Honedge knows Fury Cutter (a Bug-type move), I can get rid of Vespiquen and still maintain team-balance.  GO TEAM BALANCE!

But before we do anything swap-related, I found a TM that everyone and their fucking mother needs to learn...Venoshock.  Ivysaur, you're way on the top of the list for this bad-boy, and Vespiquen, you can drop Sweet Scent to learn this.  It's important.

Now that that's all taken care of, let's wipe up the rest of the trainers here and...

Okay...we need to talk about something.

Asshole dog.  This thing is a fucking tank and has caused me nothing but chaos every time a trainer whips this guy out.  I mean, look at this shit:

Fought a married couple with matching Furfrou...fucking things were nigh unstoppable.  AND IT'S JUST A NORMAL-TYPE!!! I didn't want to do this, but I may have to backtrack and catch one of these fucking things.  I have a feeling that these things are going to be the unsung gems of this generation and I do not intend on missing out on the bandwagon.  DOG! COME TO ME!

That's my boy! Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy!

Furfrou:  A Normal-type Pokemon.  Surprisingly-high Special Defense and Speed stats, as well as a nice Attack.  If you want to screw over a Special Attack team, send in this guy.

Okay, now that that's out of the way, I should probably head to the chateau.  Maybe new Pokemon? Maybe cool new items? Team Flare showing up? Legendary encounter? Anything is possible.

Frogadier, Lv. 23

Ivysaur, Lv. 21

Fletchinder, Lv. 20

Ralts, Lv. 19

Pancham, Lv. 18

Honedge, Lv. 13

Pokedex: 23, Badges: 1